Just jokes, man...

A man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk
when he comes upon a preacher baptizing people in a river.

The drunk walk into the water and accidentally bumps into the preacher.

The preacher turns around and is almost overcome by the smell of booze.
Whereupon he asks the drunk, "Are you ready to find Jesus?"

"Yes I am", replies the drunk.

So, the preacher grabs him and dunks him in the river.
He pulls him up and asks the drunk, "Brother, have you found Jesus?"

The drunk replies, "No, I haven't"
The preacher, shocked at the answer, dunks him into the water again.
but for a bit longer this time.

He pulls him out of the water and asks again, "Have you found Jesus, my brother?"

The drunk again answers, "No, I have not found Jesus..."

By this time the preacher is at his wit's end so he dunks the drunk
in the water again, but this time he holds him down for 60 seconds.

When the drunk begins kicking his arms and legs, the preacher pulls him up.
He asks again, "For the love of God, have you found Jesus?!"

The drunk wipes his eyes
and catches his breath
and says to the preacher,

"Are you sure this is where he fell in?"

hahahaha.
Oh come on, laugh!

thirteen moons

"We lay all night talking together until the first color of morning, and then we slept an hour or two, and when we awoke, everything below was a white ocean of fog.
We boiled coffee atop one of only a few sunlit islands. And then the fog lifted out of the valleys and the folded world revealed itself and went on as far as the limits of sight permitted.

We spent three nights sleeping out on the bald, living like angels, high above the corrugated world, bathed in various hues of light from dawn to dawn, privileged to be young at the highest pitch of green summer.

We had taken little food and a single pot and a few blankets, but many books.
Had it been rainy, we would have been miserable.
The days, though, were blue.
And the nights silver, lit by the briefest full moon of the year, arcing so bright across the sky that we read by it, both of us mad with words in whatever form, poems or tales.
Sometimes we read to ourselves and sometimes to each other."

"As far as I knew, we would go on endless. Youth and night and wild freedom and not one real worry yet intruding our thoughts.
Riding with the certainty that life could be a stream of such moments, a dream forever.
I thought we could ride beyond the endurance or even the mortality of our horses.
Beyond the mortality of ourselves."

-thirteen moons by charles frazier

Wisdom beyond years

This video is the recording of a call that 13 year old Logan made to his local Christian radio station...this kid is crazy-amazing.

Go grab a box of tissues before you listen.
Trust me.

So watch your step, big guy

"You might be a big fish
in a little pond
...doesn't mean you've won
because along may come a bigger one."

-coldplay

I can not stress it enough...

1. People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.

2. If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.

3. If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.

4. The good you do today, will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.

5. Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.

6. The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.

7. People favor underdogs, but follow only top dogs.
Fight for the underdogs anway.

8. What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.

9. People really need help, but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.

10. Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.

buzz off, okay?

There's a fly buzzing around my house that is near death.
It's acting a little demented.
I've been waiting for 5 hours now, and it still flying around like a sick little idiot.

Firstly, I was in my kitchen making a turkey and taters lunch.
I see this fly on the floor making seizure movements.
And then it just...freezes.

So, I walk over and stare at it.
And it's legs start moving.
So, me with my logical explanation ready, thinks
"OH GEE, IT'S PROBABLY STUCK ON IT'S BACK. I SHOULD ASSIST IT."

I grab a piece of paper and walk back to the kitchen
and the fly is just gone.

So, I think, "IT PROBABLY FLEW AWAY AND IS PERFECTLY FINE"
(right? logical explanation once again)

So say, 2 hours later, I see the fly buzzing around like flies do.
and then it promptly runs itself into the wall
and lands on my dining room table.
Then, it gets over the shock of the impact and flies away.

And it keeps doing it.
It's sick and dying and it keeps running into things.
And falling.
And I feel bad for it.

But THEN, I was sitting at this very desk,
and I feel something hit my forehead
and I look down
and THERE IS THE FLY

this thing should die soon, right?
God, take this little fly home to fly heaven
so it won't keep running into things. (like me)